In the last 5 years I have moved in and out of 7 houses,5 cities and 3 countries. No place seems strange and no place seems familiar.
I often ask myself – where is home?
Is home the city I was born in and spent the first 25 years of my life? It has taken only 5 to rob me of my feeling of comfort…my friends, my family. Today I feel like a stranger in my own city. Places & people are – just poor shadows of their former selves.
Could home be the city I spent the last 2 years where I worked and lived, acquired new friends and a place to stay ? Where I plan to live for many years in the future - even though I don't live there right now. I feel tempted to call it home. Then something holds me back. When I walk through the streets I don’t see any memories from my past lurking around its corners. Cutting through the din of the passing traffic I don’t hear the sound of my friends’ cackling, breaking out into a spontaneous joke. My eyes see just buildings - brick and mortar structures. Inside - my heart is silent.
Hey isn’t this the building that once housed Gazebo where we’d come often from college…pooling in our pocket money to buy us a single pizza.
And there – when you go down that road – there is an old cloth market where I remember going with ma as a child. Wading through those gallis and stopping at to refuel at Kamat’s .
No such stories around them come to the fore! How can a place devoid of memories be considered home? Some day – when I collect enough memories around this place – may be I’d call it home – but not just yet.
When I speak about this to friends, I realize I am not the only one who feels this way. For many of us, the one thing in life that is constant is this act of moving from place to place. Unnerving it is for a while but at the end of the day one learns to accept this lifestyle. This new way of living – I guess warrants a new definition of what one would call home. For me ‘A Home’ today has become – (not a place….but) a person I return to!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------October 4, 2006 - Update
1. A couple of more perspectives here and here
2. The count has now increased to - 8 houses, 6 cities and 4 countries....and is likely to change once again next month !
Hmmm looks like 24/25 is the age where most people move huh! I moved out at 24. Interesting.
ReplyDeleteHome is where you make it to be. Unfortunately I have to live in Hot Malta for one year :(
well..everytime I read a post abt home..I can think of only bombay...nostalgic times!
ReplyDeletenaveen. thank you. am beginning to feel like a complete nomad these days. just need to get myself the gypsy attire and carry a stick on my shoulder with a polka dotted 'potli' at the end of it. wonder what they put in that though?
ReplyDeleteekta & anand - glad you feel so rooted despite the many moves
me - if 24 / 25 is the age when people move...wonder if there is any age when people find themselves 'back home' - whereever that is.